Since becoming a mother, one of my biggest pet peeves is that women have this attitude of being a better mother, wife....fill in the blank. I always thought that when I joined the ranks of motherhood, I would have all of this support and advice and helpfulness from other women. Yes, some have been kind enough to take me under their wing and show me what my own mother was incapable of doing. But, for the most part women are the most competitive people on this planet. Have you noticed that we all try to be perfect likenesses of June Cleaver, Betty Crocker and Martha Stewart all rolled into one super-human woman? Last year, I had some really tough times and I wrote some of my poetry for my new book during that time. Some of it is a little dark, but it definitely expresses what I was going through at the time. My only wish is that we women could embrace each other and lift each other up in our roles as Moms. Wouldn't it be nice if we didn't have to tear each other apart in our quest for perfection? I've done the whole perfectionist lifestyle and I just about drove myself bonkers. I've since discovered that is not the lifestyle for me - I'm not trying to prove anything to anyone and most perfectionists are trying to prove something to someone. I just want to be content being myself - and if that means that everyone else has to claw their way to the top and bypass me, than so be it.
Most of the time I feel as though I don't fit in anywhere with other Mom's. I joined a MOPS group - didn't really feel like I fit in there and thank goodness my schedule changed at work so now I don't even have to bother going. I joined thinking I could really benefit from these other women - but I felt more like we were there to see who was the best dressed, who had the best kids, etc....I could just keep going on and on. It's really sad too....I could really benefit from other Mom's who have some experience under their belts. Instead, I've started buying parenting books - I'm currently reading "A Woman After God's Own Heart" by Elizabeth George. I've misplaced the other book I started but it's pretty good too. Hopefully I'll find it again. So, I suppose I'm just writing this because I'm a little disappointed that when women become mothers they are so stuck on being SuperMommy and clawing their way to the top. That is truly my lament. My greatest desire is to teach London that your worth is not based on wearing name-brand clothes/shoes, or hanging out with the "A" crowd. I can only hope that the kind of mother I am today will shape his character to become a kind, young man with compassion for others. Too many people derive their worth by the clothes they wear, cars they drive and houses they live in.
And, by the way....thank you to those mom's who have helped me along the way and help to make me feel good about my role as a mom. It is truly appreciated.
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